If im brutally honest things are pants, big bridget jones ones.
I feel lower than I ever have and it is scaring me so much.
Yesterday went ok, better than expected.
Today has been rubbish. Was later up, 9am, walked dogs and it was such hard work.
Went to Grimsby but under duress, did not want to go. Went to get a new laptop which Harry and Scott have generously given me money for for my Christmas present. I couldnt work up any enthusiasm and it was just like a cattle market. Came home without anything. Went to sleep. Woke up, harry wante dto go to his mums but I didnt feel like seeing anyone so Im on computer on my own and thats fine.
Course work looming but i feel so drugged its hard to concentrate. Also am waiting for the email or phone call to tell me about Rosie. I feel like im on a knife edge.
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